Dating For Marriage: Why Red Pill Strategies Backfire

In this episode, we explore the two key topics: how to secure and convert high-quality partners and how to avoid hypergamy in relationships. The discussion delves into personal examples and broader societal observations, including the dynamics that made the hosts' relationship successful. We also touch on the pitfalls of traditional and urban monoculture relationship paradigms, and the importance of having an aligned objective function for a stable partnership. Insights on effective dating strategies, transparency, and ideological alignment in relationships are shared to help viewers navigate their own journey to finding a lasting and fulfilling relationship.

Simone Collins: [00:00:00] Hello everyone. I'm really excited to be talking with you today. I am a woman, a wolf, I'm hypergamous, I'm evil. And I'm going to tell you exactly why I chose my husband, who of course I will discard someday for a better, I mean, maybe let's find out specifically the two concepts we're going to be discussing in this episode.

is how I secured Simone as a wife. And the second is IE, why did she develop feelings for me from her own perception? Why did she decide to marry me when before this she had been very urban monoculture, very in that bubble, you know, how do you secure and convert, not just secure, but convert high quality women?

And then second, how do you avoid hypergamy? We're talking about this because a lot of people following this podcast are interested in finding a wife and also many of the ambitious, intelligent, successful young women they're dating are [00:01:00] also very urban monoculture pill. They're just like me. They never want to have kids.

They want to focus on their career. They're the idea of pregnancy is abhorrent to them. So maybe we can use me as a case study delve into my previous brain and at least the, the dynamics that enabled. Malcolm's in my relationship to happen to see if maybe some of this might be replicated for you if this is a goal of yours.

And then how to avoid hypergamy, which I would argue is made likely by overly trad relationships. Both being too overly urban monoculture or overly trad makes you very at risk for hypergamy. That's interesting. The first thing I think of when you mentioned that is when it comes to careers, the smart thing is to switch careers every few years because you're able to get a better income.

And I wonder if the same dynamic is the case when your career is being a wife, like after a few years, especially if you feel like you're appreciating in value, like if you're building an online following or you're getting hotter in any way, like if you're actually a terrible wife trading [00:02:00] up and being hypergamous is, is actually the logical thing to do.

That's interesting. Sorry. Well, let's start with you and why you chose me and what guys have Gotten your eye before. Yeah, so I have a very consistent track record of people I've had crushes on since I was a teen the universal factor is Having a unique passion for something in your life, knowing who you are and being very transparent about it and unapologetic about it.

In other podcasts, we've, we've alluded to this like very embarrassing crush I had on this guy who was really into Catholic doctrine. And I would go to his dorm room bringing all these cupcakes and asking him hard questions about Catholicism. Cause it was just like my excuse to like get him to talk to me more.

I had crushes on people. who were, you know, ended up, he ended up, he's like, Oh, Simone, I've enjoyed these discussions with you so much. I've decided to become a priest. And she's like, [00:03:00] no, this is how good my game is. For those who don't know, Catholic priests can't marry or date. So yeah, that was, yeah.

I know it worked out really well. Come on, Malcolm. I'm really all is as it should be. I want to take a few notes on what you're saying here because Simone is not unique in this fact. Not at all. Most high value women I know have this profile in terms of what that like gets them excited about a partner.

And A lot of the guys I know when they are pursuing women do not pursue them using these techniques and we'll go over the techniques that they use that are really ineffective. The first, I think one thing I'll just note is even when you look at a lot of the crushes that take place in fictional universes it's often on guys who.

I have no interest in women are not like, Oh, I'm here. Cause I'm like powerful and cool. It's men who are extremely passionate about whatever it is. Like be that revenge or [00:04:00] saving their kingdom or something else. It's people who know who they are and have a mission and are pursuing it. And these are the women, this, these are the men to whom women want to hitch their wagons.

Yep. Lots of Luigi Mini Gionni fan fictions going around right now. I was just watching that. Oh dear. But I, I. I want to explain one, why this is the case. And two, the, the reason why guys are making mistakes is the first mistake comes downstream of the red pill movement. And you and I would actually consider ourselves like red pillars to an extent.

The red pill is fundamentally correct where it taught guys that, hey, women say they want X, but they really want Y. But there was a sub caveat to everything the red pill taught men and everything the pickup artist taught men Which was, this is how you win on the sexual marketplace. And as we've always pointed out, there are two key marketplaces.

There is the sexual marketplace, and there is the marriage slash long [00:05:00] term relationship marketplace. And on the sexual marketplace, women have an enormous advantage. And, you know, these same guys will laugh at women who think they can get the same type of guy to marry them as they can get to sleep with them on a one night stand, but not apply just as for that woman, different rules apply between these two marketplaces, different things are arousing, different things are desirable.

The same thing is true for men. And so they apply. Tools and techniques that have been optimized to secure a woman who will sleep with you as quickly as possible. Like, as attractive as a woman as possible, sleeping with you as quickly as possible. Well, what's one of the things that those techniques are going to filter out if they are working as intended?

They are going to filter out chaste women very early. You would want them to filter out chaste women. But I'm going to a bar and I am looking to come home and sleep with someone that night. A pickup line that causes [00:06:00] a woman like Simone, who before me had never slept with someone to like and walk away is actually a good line.

It increases the probability that you end up going home with someone. But the problem is, is it also means that intrinsically the women who you are bringing home are gonna be well, both one less chaste and two less interesting. And so you could say, okay, so why is it that so many of this chaste cast of women is thinking like Simone is in terms of their arousal pattern?

Like, why are they looking for a man who has a mission? And I think that there is. A line in Rick and Morty that is said derogatorily, but it's actually, I think, the aspiration for a lot of women. Which is, he says, hey,

I mean, it's not like he's a hot girl. He can't just bail on his life and set up shop in someone else's.

Simone Collins: But that, I think, is the reality of an aspiration among many women.

Is they want to set themselves up in a [00:07:00] life that looks like it's going to matter and be respected. Or at least be something that they can take personal pride in being a part of. I think it also might correlate with long term signs of career stability. So it, this is the behavior that you would expect from someone who is not a free radical, from someon