Living with Incurable Cancer: Becki Ross on Planning Her Own Funeral & Learning “Not to Give a Sh*t"

Becki Ross was given two to three years to live. Diagnosed at 42 with stage four, incurable bowel cancer, she's a mum of two teenagers, a teacher, and one of those rare people who lights up a room the second she walks in.

When we recorded this, Becki had just been told her treatment options had run out - that the cancer was, in her words, "declaring itself," and that her time is now very short.

In one of the most powerful conversations we've ever had, Becki talks about planning her own funeral - the plywood coffin, the celebrant, the plan to climb in herself just to make everyone laugh - and about the parts that aren't funny at all: the fear, the reality of leaving her kids behind, and the perspective that's come with facing it head-on.

It's a conversation full of light and shade. We talk about the Cancer Crushers, the village of friends carrying Becki and her kids, the health system she's had to fight through, her daughter Maddie's unforgettable words, and the humour that's got her through all of it.

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